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A Lesson in International Politics
 
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Sin
Admin
Admin
87019 Points

USA US Michigan
PostYou have posted in this forum: Sun Nov 14, 2010 12:41 am   Post subject:  A Lesson in International Politics Back to top 

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats, and have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved". Soon, though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit Cross". The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940, when tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from "Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance". The last time the British issued a "Bloody Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.

The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the Bastards". They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.

The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide". The only two higher levels in France are "Collaborate" and "Surrender". The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's military capability.

Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to "Elaborate Military Posturing". Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat Operations" and "Change Sides".

The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs". They also have two higher levels: "Invade a Neighbour" and "Lose".

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels.

The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a really good look at the old Spanish navy.

Americans meanwhile, and as usual, are carrying out pre-emptive strikes on all of their allies "just in case".

Canada doesn't have any alert levels.

New Zealand has raised its security levels - from "baaa" to "BAAAA". Due to continuing defence cutbacks, New Zealand has only one more level of escalation, which is "I hope Australia will come and rescue us".

Australia, meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to "She'll be alright, mate". Three more escalation levels remain: "Crikey!", "I think we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend" and "The barbie is cancelled". So far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.

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LuneKnight
Retired
Retired
31257 Points

USA
PostYou have posted in this forum: Sun Nov 14, 2010 3:39 pm   Post subject:   Back to top 

lmfao

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miller
Retired
Retired
40315 Points

USA US Massachusetts
PostYou have posted in this forum: Sun Nov 14, 2010 6:22 pm   Post subject:   Back to top 

New Zealand = win

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millerbee(r) a.k.a.
Imagine my xfire profile here.
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BECK
General of the Army
General of the Army
279757 Points

USA US Colorado
PostYou have posted in this forum: Mon Nov 15, 2010 10:12 am   Post subject:   Back to top 

This is awesome! Great post Thumbs Up

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PumpkiN
Retired
Retired
102492 Points

Estonia
PostYou have posted in this forum: Tue Nov 16, 2010 7:57 am   Post subject:   Back to top 

got to admit. this is kinda funny!

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God does not play dice with the universe.
AAH.. but he does....

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Sin
Admin
Admin
87019 Points

USA US Michigan
PostYou have posted in this forum: Tue Nov 16, 2010 2:19 pm   Post subject:   Back to top 

I forgot the site I pulled these from. I'll try to find it again.

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NippleJu!ce
IoW Supporter
4582 Points

USA US Florida
PostYou have posted in this forum: Wed Nov 17, 2010 1:07 am   Post subject:   Back to top 

Fucking hilarious!

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